


Five Times Clint Barton Didn’t Regret Being in House Arrest and the One Time He Did.

by spectralarchers



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Battle at the London Sanctum, Black Panther - Freeform, Bombings of New York City, DODC Plane, Deaf Clint Barton, Doctor Strange - Freeform, Ghost Rider - Freeform, Karen Page - Freeform, Lewis Wilson - Freeform, Post-CACW, The Punisher TV Series, The Vulture - Freeform, Wakanda, War Dogs, pre-IW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-11 22:49:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15326112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spectralarchers/pseuds/spectralarchers
Summary: Two years is a long time to be in house arrest - especially when you're a retired Avenger and SHIELD agent.





	Five Times Clint Barton Didn’t Regret Being in House Arrest and the One Time He Did.

**Author's Note:**

> There are mentions of domestic abuse in the first part of the fic. 
> 
> There are mentions of a cow going to slaughter in the second part of the fic. Nothing too gorey or explicit.
> 
> There are mentions of the 9/11 attacks in the third part of the fic.
> 
> All the dates are picked off the Marvel Cinematic Universe wikipedia for continuity.

 

 **I. July 6th, 2016 - War Dogs across the world attacking intelligence agencies / Black Panther** **  
**

 

 

The first Clint hears of the incident, he’s sitting in the living room and zapping through channels on the television. Nathaniel is sleeping in his lap, and Lila and Cooper are quietly doing their homework in the dining room.

He’s renovated the dining room into a workspace that both the kids and Laura can use, since they weren’t eating in the dining room anyway - there’s a big oak table in the middle of the room, allowing everyone a spot to work at.

The back-wall is covered in cupboards and drawers for all the stationery that Laura, Lila and Nathaniel like to use. Clint promised that there would be no more renovations after Ultron, but he’d lied - when the House Arrest order was put on the table, he’d told Laura that the only way for him to survive the two years would be to have something to work on.

It’s only been 10 days since he was broken out of the Raft by Steve Rogers, but the ankle bracelet around his leg is already bothering him more than he’d hoped. It feels heavy against his leg, and he’s had to get used to the green light that’s turning on and off every other second.

Thankfully, most DIY stores had home delivery options, and getting the materials for his renovations never turned out to be a problem. Sure, some of them asked about the ankle bracelet, but most of the inhabitants of Waverly, Iowa, knew why the absentee father of the Barton family was suddenly confined to his home.

The little Barton boy who had disappeared those twenty-five years ago when a circus had come through town hadn’t been forgotten. And his heroics with the Avengers hadn’t gone unnoticed either.

While Clint was renovating, he’d pulled off the light turquoise wallpaper in the dining room and had suddenly found himself sitting on his ass, gazing at the wallpaper that had decorated the room when he was a child.

Echoes from the voice of his father had caused him to stop in the middle of the renovations. For a couple of minutes, he’d sat there, unable to move, as he almost saw the shadows on the wall dance after his father’s never ending abusive episodes. He remembered how he’d hid behind furniture, hoping his father would fall asleep before managing to land a hit with the belt. He remembered how terrified he’d been to come back to his house, back when Fury had landed the deal with Clint and Laura. He remembered how he had been so afraid to end up like his father, back when Laura had been pregnant with Cooper.

After he’d finally managed to get himself together to pull the rest of the wallpaper off, behind one of the heavy dressers that had stood there for as long as he remembers, he’d found a spot on the wallpaper covered in dried blood.

Closing his eyes, Clint had remembered what had caused it - he remembered the incident where his father hit him so hard on the head that his hearing had gone for months. It was the first time that he’d been deaf in his entire life, but he still remembers it like it was yesterday.

Only Barney had bothered to try and learn sign language with him.

Looking up at the television that’s speaking of some strange events happening around the world in several intelligence agencies, as if an organized attack had been set in motion, but had been aborted halfway through.

Clint turns the volume on, and switches the dial on his hearing aids up so he can hear what’s being said.

The news anchor doesn’t have a lot of information. A press release states that an order has been given somewhere, but the American Intelligence Agencies don’t know where from. It’s as if some sleeper agents had just been ordered to overrule all their other training - something Clint knows can happen overnight, as half of SHIELD had turned out to be HYDRA. He shivers, thinking back to the people who’d had his back for so many years, who had turned out to be traitors and murderers.

Clint sighs, as the news flash moves on to some sports results, as if the event was just the latest in the string of strange events that had been beginning to happen around the world ever since Loki had opened up the portal, in the New Mexican desert. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, he thinks back to PEGASUS and to Thor’s hammer, to Phil Coulson and the Tesseract, and about how it all started.

He puts his hand to his chest, where the mark Loki’s scepter had left still sits, and looks down on his youngest son. He’s sleeping tight, enjoying some rest after having played outside and helped Clint herd the chickens into their new pen.

Laura is out at work - she’s job hunting in the city - both Waverly and Des Moines, which isn’t too far away, all things considered.

They’d decided it was the best thing to do, what with the ankle monitor sitting on his ankle keeping him from moving further than the edges of his property.

Tony Stark had made a case for Clint, when Secretary Ross had requested the House Arrest: Clint Barton, ex-Agent of Shield, ex-US Army Major and holding a clean criminal record up until the Germany Incident, was to be given some form of leniency, compared to Scott Lang, ex-convict and regular civilian.

Clint tunes out the news, and closes his eyes.

Being a stay-at-home dad suits him just fine. The ankle is a pain, sure. But he can still take care of the farm, and there’s lots to do.

He’s just sown the seeds for new barley crops up the field, and there’s work to do on the old barn. His son moves on the couch next to him, and Clint turns of the screen as he allows Nathaniel to wake up from the nap. His son has just turned one, and is beginning to vocalize properly and is learning how to use his mouth to scream as loud as possible.

If there’s one good thing that came out of Clint losing his hearing when Steve Rogers busted him and the others out of the Raft, it was the ability to tune down the volume of a whining child.

(Not that he ever does, though: he thinks of doing it, but he could never. Ever. He’s too afraid of becoming like his father, that he wouldn’t dream of it).

 

* * *

 

 

****II. September, 23rd, 2016 - Hijack of the DODC plane from Avengers Tower, crash in Coney Island / Spider-Man: Homecoming** **

 ( _Trigger warnings: mention of butchering a cow and mention of blood_ ). 

 

The next incident that catches Clint’s attention is the failed hijacking of the last plane Stark had been using to move his things from the Tower to the Avengers facility.

Clint had been following the developments of the Spider-kid on the news - especially after meeting and fighting said kid in Germany.

Clint’s been in house arrest for 87 days and he’s beginning to think of the limitations of this whole house arrest thing. He’s sown and harvested the barley crops, he’s brought in the cows and renovated the barn enough so that he could slaughter two of the cows for the winter and the next year.

Tony had visited - he’d asked how the hell Clint knew how to do that, and Clint had smirked and told him that one of the things his father taught him, other than how to use a belt buckle on someone smaller than himself, was how to butcher a whole load of farm animals and different forms for game. He’d invited Tony to help him out as he’d killed the first cow, but Tony had declined and insisted on helping Laura instead.

Clint knows that Tony is feeling guilty about leaving Clint in house arrest, with that damn ankle bracelet keeping him confined to his homestead. In a way, Clint feels anger towards Tony as well, but all in all, he’s thankful. For once, he’s out of the fight for good - he literally can’t leave or he’ll have the US government running wild. And, for once, he knows that there will be direct consequences. His family is no longer a big secret and he can’t just ask SHIELD to cover for him.

Clint is out in the barn, cutting up some of the pieces from the cow to put into the big freezers he’s bought for this purpose, listening to the radio. It’s quiet, the kids are in bed, it’s late - he’d promised Laura to do it when the kids were sleeping so that they wouldn’t wander in on him covered in blood or cutting up their dear old Star, who was ready for slaughter months ago. But, Clint had remembered one lesson his father had taught him, in spite of everything else: do not slaughter during fly season.

Late September was one of the better periods to do it, so here Clint was, hands deep in cutting out the pieces from an 800 kg, 36 months old cow that he remembers Lila had been feeding with a baby bottle.

Beside him, the radio continues. Some guy, calling himself the Vulture - or maybe it’s just an exaggeration from Jameson, again - had been going for the last cargo shipment out of the Avengers Tower.

All of that feels so far away for Clint - to think that, less than two years ago he’d been partying at the top of that tower, that he’d fought an Ultron and more there? It feels so far away. He can barely remember the smell of the new furniture and the whole floor that Tony had dedicated to him. Tony had thrown in a training range inspired by the Hunger Game movies just for him.

All of that had been before Tony knew about Laura and the kids. Clint sighs, as he listens to the radio newscast who keeps talking about the crash and how the Spider-kid had saved the day by leaving Adrian Toomes for law enforcement to deal with. The news anchor speculates on what the crates must have contained, and Clint smirks.

Knowing Tony, there had been be some good things in there. Tony had always talked about upgrading everyone’s suits, including Clint’s. Clint had always thought no, and as he listens to the voice speculating about what Iron Man parts the Vulture might have stolen if he had succeeded, Clint looks at the crate on the floor that he’s been avoiding for a while now. It showed up under some of the old floorboards he’d removed to renovate this part of the barn, and he hasn’t really touched it for a long time.

He knows what it contains, but he doesn’t feel like it’s the right moment yet. Maybe it won’t ever be.

He knows it contains a letter and a suit, and he knows exactly in which scenario to don the garb, but he doubts it. He’s retired, he’s happy, he’s got some mouths to feed and he doesn’t exactly believe that it will ever come in handy.

The radio host continues talking about the Ellis Island Ferry incidents, about how Iron Man had saved the day, and Clint chuckles. Good old Tony - flying around the world, bonding with politicians and other fancy people to try and make up for the disaster that had been the Accords and the fight against Rogers and Barnes. For a second, Clint’s mind wanders to Barnes. He’d barely talked with the Winter Soldier since he’d met him, back in the parking lot of Leipzig Airport, some months ago, and he thinks back to the pain he must have been in.

All that time, with memories of doing things he didn’t want to do. He’d hoped to talk to Barnes about it. About his time under Loki’s influence, but he had never found the time. And when the time of the breakout came, things had gone awry and he’d had to be rushed to a hospital. The hearing aids still feel strange in his ears, but Stark had assured him that he would get used to them.

As he finishes washing his hands, and puts the last vacuum packed pieces of meat into the freezer, Clint grabs one of the silk satchels lying on the crate and takes it back to the house with him.

Laura asks him what he’s doing, when she catches him taking down one of the antler decorations from above the fireplace, and hanging the sharp katana up there. He assures her that the kids won’t be tall enough to touch it just yet, and he smiles.

There’s no need for those things anymore, anyway.

 

* * *

 

 

****III. December 6th, 2016 - Bombings in New York City (Lewis Wilson)** **

****

The cold plains of Iowa are covered in feet thick snow. There’s white all the way to the horizon, and ever since Black Friday had come and gone, Clint has been thinking about walking into the forest to hunt.

It’s not something he’d think about normally, but the fact that he can’t go hunting unless it’s on his own property bothers him today.

He’d heard about the terrorist attacks in New York on the morning radio as he was showering. Laura and Cooper had used up all the hot water, and as he was biting down hard to ignore the feeling of cold water against his skin, he’d heard. The ATF Field Office, the 10th Precinct Police Station and federal courthouses were touched, and civilians had been killed and injured.

Of all the things- Gods, monsters, aliens, organized crime and a guy with a glowing hand and a bulletproof black man, New York was still standing, in spite of another act of terror within her streets.

Clint thinks back to the frenzy of 2001, when the World Trade Center had crumbled to pieces within some hours, and thinks to the panic that must have run through the veins of the people of New York. He thinks back to the skies opening up above Stark Tower and thousands of aliens swarming the skies, chopping off heads and impaling civilians. He thinks back to the Gang War, put to an abrupt end by the Punisher as he took matters into his own hands.

News outlets are claiming that a veteran soldier, Lewis Wilson, is behind it. The name rings a bell, but Clint isn’t sure why - he hasn’t been a part of the US military for years. He used to be a major - and he likes to joke with Steve that, technically, he outranks him.

He’s listening to the radio, when they mention Karen Page, and he frowns. The name rings a bell, but he isn’t sure. Stopping the cold water stream, he steps out of the shower and grabs the towel, drying himself thoroughly so as to not catch a cold, before he wraps it around his waist and picks up the razor, to shave and clean himself up.

The radio keeps talking about the injured and the death toll that’s climbed a bit more, and Clint curses when he remembers that he needs to removed the plastic bag from the ankle bracelet - he’s going to hate the tanning mark he’s going to have by the time they take this thing off. He curses as he does it, and for once, he sits down on the edge of the bathtub and thinks to why he ended here.

There’s people out there getting hurt - he listens to the radio that talks about the explosions and where a replay from an onlooker is being player again - and he wants to help again. But he knows he can’t. He couldn’t. He’s too old. He looks at the mirror in front of him and sees the hairs on his head and he sees a couple of white hairs. He’s getting older. Older than his parents ever were. He can’t even go talk to his mother’s grave, with that thing around his ankle.

He pushes himself up from the tub, and looks at his face. He’s got more lines than he thought, and maybe finally, he realizes that the house arrest is a good thing for him. It’s been over half a year now, and he’s learning the lessons.

As he applies the shaving cream, he thinks to the paw prints he saw in the snow the day before, of the bobcat he knows lives under the porch. He’s been wiping them away with a broom every morning so that Cooper doesn’t try to crawl under there to pet the wild cat. Putting the razor to his face, he quietly takes it down as he shaves his cheek, listening to the radio.

Karen Page had called out the terrorist on the radio - claiming that he was a coward.

He chuckles. Cowards use bombs, and they refuse to watch the others die at their hand. He’s watched countless enemies die through his scope and the moment his arrows take their lives. He has an arrow with an explosive tip. Well, he had.

Part of the deal had been that Ross would take all of his bows, his arrows, his guns and his knives. All the weapons they could find on the premises, except the shotgun that was registered to Laura’s name. It wasn’t his, so they couldn’t claim it. And even Secretary Thaddeus Ross had not tried his luck with Laura Barton. Clint chuckles as he remembers the sight on Ross’ face when he’d met the Woman of the House and he’d gone running out there.

Clint finishes shaving, listening to the radio as he does so and the moment he leaves the bathroom he turns off the sound and walks downstairs. Laura is leaning on the kitchen counter, her phone in one hand and a coffee mug in the other. Walking up to her, Clint kisses her and asks her what she’s doing.

She’s googling more information on the bombings in New York, she replies, and they exchange a glance. A glance that says more than Clint would ever be able to - a glance that says I’m glad you’re here. I’m glad you’re safe. I’m glad you’re home.

Clint picks up his mug and pours himself a cup of coffee, as he sits down on the chair by the kitchen table, fine tuning his hearing aids. He doesn’t say another word for a while, as he reads the newspaper that’s been delivered by snow scooter to the house. He’s got some repairs to do - the heavy snowfalls had broken some of the branches of the trees off, and he needs to take care of the potential burning wood before it starts to rot.

He sips his coffee as he reads over the news from the day before.

There are worse places to be.

 

* * *

 

 

****IV. January 18th, 2017 - Battle at the London Sanctum and Battle at the New York Sanctum** **

 

 

When a battle of unknown forces seems to take out a whole building in downtown London, and when a location of similar architecture is the witness of a same battle, Clint is too busy baby-proofing the house to pay attention, until Lila comes home from school and tells him about it. Nathaniel was now over a year and a half, and big enough to heist himself up to a standing position and begin grabbing door knobs, things on the sofa table, pull off the pillows from the couch and more - and that meant more risks.

Nathaniel had been a master crawler, able to get from A to B faster than Clint could follow, and Clint was happy to be able to watch his son walk from A to B with his fists raised, ready to brace for impact should his chubby, little legs, give in before he reached his destination.

Naturally, it all meant that Clint was installing all sorts of clever devices to anything in the house - and in doing so, it also meant that he now cursed about three times as much trying to get into the fridge, but forgetting he’s baby-proofed it, and fumbling with the clever lock. Clever, my ass, he’d think, because even if he used to be a Level 7 SHIELD Agent and Avenger, there were still some things that were too clever for him.

Laura would tell him that it’s not that hard, but Clint would swear at the mechanism on the fridge every single time he needed to get into it.

Apparently the incidents had been trending on Twitter, and the kids at school at talked about it, Lila tells him, as he’s biting down on a couple of nails he’s going to need to install a baby gate at the bottom of the stairs. He’s listening with half an ear, paying more attention to the hole he’s trying to make in the wooden board, but then she mentions Greenwich and he frowns.

Wasn’t that where Malekith and Thor had their big showdown? Where he’d been sent to do some clean-up work? He looks over at Lila who is scrolling on her phone and reciting whatever it was she was talking about, and Clint realizes that Nathaniel is nowhere to be seen.

As she talks about wizards and magic and someone on Instagram having tagged a post with “hashtag doctor strange” about the attack in New York, Clint pushes himself up from his kneeling position to try and locate his son, except he is nowhere to be seen. Frowning, he gets up to a standing position and begins to walk around the living room to locate the little devil, and when he finally spots him, Clint rushes to grab his kid under the arms and pull him away from the crate that he’s brought in from the barn.

He tells his son that it’s not for him, that he shouldn’t touch that, and gently goes to sit Nathaniel down next to Lila. Nathaniel is off on his feet before Clint can take one step away, and as he follows his son around the house, straight back to the crate, he looks up, not at the ceiling but at whatever is up there, to give him patience. He finally plops down on the floor next to the crate that Nathaniel is so intent on looking at - climb onto, actually, as it turns out - and watches the little scene unfolding before him.

Lila has gone quiet next to him, and when he realizes it she’s watching him, and the ankle bracelet that blinks every other second. She asks him if that thing is what is keeping him from going and helping in New York. She says there has been a lot of things happening there, and that at school, the History teacher is saying it’s because the Avengers have disbanded. The English teacher says it’s because of the Accords, and that it shouldn’t have happened, any of it.

Lila is more perceptive now, than she was when Clint went off to fight Ultron in Sokovia, and she knows. She understood the day the Secretary of State came to their house and took all of her father’s bows, and he’d caught her watching Vine compilations on YouTube from the 2012 New York incident. He hadn’t said anything to her, because he didn’t want to frighten her about the truth of what his job used to be.

So, he just shrugs. He tells her that he’s feeling better here, at home with her and Nate and Coop, and that he can finally be the father he always wanted to be. Nathaniel interrupts Clint’s answer as he pulls open the crate and almost tumbles backwards off the lid. Thankfully, Clint’s reflexes are still as sharp as ever, and he manages to catch his son as the black and golden silken garb unfolds from the sudden lack of vacuum.

Clint closes the crate again, and pulls his son into his lap and kisses his forehead. The scare of the almost fall upset Nathaniel, and by swinging him back and forth against his own chest seems to calm him down. Nathaniel’s small hand reaches out to the crate again, but this time Clint gets up, holding his son in his arms, and locks the crate with a couple of pushes with his foot.

He tells Lila that there are other people out there taking care of the world while he’s here, taking care of them. He’d promised that he wouldn’t leave again, he tells her, and after he had cancelled the water skiing, he’d gone to prison and had to take a deal to be able to stay here with them. Clint lifts the crate as he says that, and puts it on one of the stairs, before locking the baby gate and letting Nathaniel loose again.

A few moans escape his son’s mouth as he realizes the baby gate is keeping him from his prize, but Clint simply puts his hands on his hips and watches. He doesn’t hear Lila run for him, and only feels her when she impacts his waist and clings onto him.

The New York and London Sanctums have been attacked, but there are other people out there to protect humanity. He’s retired, he thinks, as he strokes her hair.

This isn’t his job anymore.

 

* * *

 

 

****V. March 16th, 2017 - Ghost Rider becoming popular in Los Angeles.** **

 

 

Adam, his neighbor, a man ten years Clint’s senior, is helping him fix the roof of the barn when the conversation turns to the Ghost Rider in Los Angeles.

Clint’s been following the situation from a far, but he hasn’t checked into his SHIELD account for more information. The only thing he knows about the sightings and the deaths, is from the news and Adam. They’ve been working on the barn for a while now, and while Clint has appreciated the help Adam has provided, the roof is the only part that he will see - well, that and the part of the barn that’s fit for the public.

He knows that Laura doesn’t agree with him having built the range behind a hidden door, but it’s where he’s been practicing. After almost a year with that damn ankle bracelet on his ankle, he’s fallen out of shape - and he can feel it. Some of his pants don’t fit around the hips anymore, and he had decided to do something about it.

He’s asked Adam to order a couple of bows and buy one or two guns for him. Adam was one of the few inhabitants of Waverly who Clint could be honest with - Adam had showed up one evening, not too long after the events that led to Clint’s house arrest, and told him everything he knew. It’s no surprise to Clint, though, Adam’s father was a friend of Clint’s as well, and well… In a small town, people stick together in times of hardship.

They talk about the powers the Ghost Rider seems to display, and they briefly talk about the South Ridge Penitentiary Riot and what had happened there - that it reminded them both of the Ryker’s Island massacre the Punisher caused, two years ago. Both of them laugh, as they take a break and pull out their respective thermos filled with coffee, and claim that it’s a lot quieter here, in the midwest.

Nobody will ever bother about the flyover states, they laugh. Clint’s almost done with the home renovations, and after almost a year in house arrest, he’s finally settled down in his role. He hasn’t had any contact with Natasha in that much time either, nor Steve or Sam, as they’re fugitives of the state as well. Tony has visited a couple of times - he came for Cooper’s show and tell, but he’s been busy with the move from the tower to the Avengers facility.

Clint’s been talking with Tony about the Spider-kid too, about responsibility. The kid is still in high school, as it turns out, and Clint can’t help but look at Cooper, who’s one year short of entering his own high school adventure. Kids are a responsibility. They’re a big one, too. Tony had told him that he knew what to do for the kid, and that he’d always be there for him, and Clint had told him he’d better be.

Adam finally points to the horizon, East, to New York. He asks Clint if he ever wants to go back, and Clint takes a couple of minutes to reply. He thinks about his answer - yes, sometimes he thinks about it. But he’s promised Laura - no more going off to save the world, no more worrying about whether he’d come home or not, and if he did, would he be whole or broken?

Thrice in the past five years, he’d gone and come back with a piece of him missing: first, after Loki, his spirit had been broken and building it back up had taken its toll on everyone. Then, he’d gone to help the Avengers locate Loki’s scepter and been speared by a HYDRA weapon. And, finally, after he’d sneaked off into the night to find Wanda and Scott and gone to Germany, he’d come back after a short stay in prison and with his hearing damaged beyond repair.

No, Clint tells Adam, he doesn’t miss being in the field. He’s getting too old for this.

Besides, he says, he was a government agent and a soldier, he never trained for aliens, monsters and whatever the Ghost Rider seemed to be - with whispers of inhumans and other things out there, with what he’s seen Wanda do, with Thor on his team, with the Hulk - no, he isn’t going to be a part of it anymore. He’s just a guy with a bow and some arrows, what can he do?

Adam smiles at that, and nods down to the house and the barn they’re building. He says that he still looks after the people, after his people. Pointing to the ankle bracelet, Adam says that it’s one of the bravest things one can do - give up your life, your freedom and more, to be with your loved ones.

 

* * *

 

 

****VI. January 10th, 2018 - Attack on Greenwich Village, attack on Vision ; January 11th, 2018 - Battle of Wakanda.** **

 

 

It’s been a year and a half since the ankle bracelet was attached to his leg. And in those many, many months, Clint has barely ever thought of ripping it off.

He’s renovated the house, he’s helped turn his 2 and a half year old son into a clever and happy little boy, he’s helped his oldest one with his maths homework and when his daughter needed help with her reading, Clint has finally taken the time to learn how to read properly and to get lessons to work to better his dyslexia.

There has been so many incidents in the world while he’s been confined to his homestead - and every single time, Clint has been able to turn his back on the world and stayed home to finally be the father he had always wished to be.

However, when the first ship lands above New York and leaves again within half an hour’s destruction, fighting and taking Anthony Stark with him, Clint knows that there’s something wrong. Something very, very wrong. It’s still early morning in Iowa when the Spider-kid and Tony fight what looks like a too realistic version of one of the characters from Spongebob Squarepants.

Sitting in the kitchen, listening to the radio as well as scrolling through his phone, Clint gets so caught up he forgets to remove the milk he’s heating on the gas and it ends up burnt. Nathaniel is sitting in his high chair and is trying to eat the Cheerios in his bowl with his fingers, but keeps getting annoyed when the milk seems to seep through his fingers instead of staying where he wants them to be.

Looking down at the ankle bracelet, Clint bites his lip and leaves it there. Whatever it is, Tony can handle it.

Right up until his burner phone rings. He looks at it, thinking about whether he should reply or not.

When Steve’s voice at the other end asks him if he knows where Wanda is, Clint tells him, Edinburgh. What’s going on, he asks. Steve has no time to explain, but time is short - he tells him to stay put, that he doesn’t need to come out and help. They can handle it. Clint asks about Tony, and Steve says they’re working on it.

A couple of hours later, the news that the Scarlet Witch and the Vision fought aliens in Edinburgh and that Captain America and others had joined the fight, Clint sits on the couch, his leg bouncing as he’s trying to find out what he should do.

It’s the team - the team is assembling to fight for something, and he doesn’t know what. He needs to know, but he can’t use the burner phone again. The landline had called, and a couple of minutes later, Homeland Security agents had arrived to the house to ask if he knew anything about what had gone down in New York or Edinburgh. If he knew anything about the location of his former teammates.

He lies through his teeth and gazes into the eyes of the CIA agent and tells them that he’s been here, for a year and a half, taking care of his kids and of his family like the deal told them.

When the CIA agents leave again, he opens the news again, and waits the whole night through for any news to come through. Laura comes down with a blanket for him and asks if everything is alright. She tells him to come to bed. He does, but only because he can’t find out how to get into some SHIELD servers to figure out what the hell is happening.

The next day begins with the rooster announcing the sunrise, and he’s up before he even knows it. He has to go.

He’s spent the whole night thinking about it - Tony Stark is missing, Steve found Wanda, whatever it was injured the Vision… He needs to go.

By the time he’s found his old duffel bag in the attic, two hours have passed.

Laura’s in the shower, Nathaniel is eating breakfast again, and Lila and Cooper are preparing themselves for school. He’s rummaging through to find his older SHIELD uniform, the one from before the Avengers that Ross didn’t take from him when he hears Nathaniel crying.

He rushes downstairs, almost falls down the ladder and watches, as piles of fine dust crumble to the floor, next to the school bags Lila and Cooper had been filling. He rushes to the shower, and kicks the door open, to find the hot water running on an empty shower, the remains of ashes scattering down the drain.

Something’s happened.

And he wasn’t there to do anything about it.

**Author's Note:**

> Alphaflyer wrote the "katana above the fireplace" thing and I couldn't not do it too, it was too good of a headcanon.
> 
> Comments, reviews, kudos in comments and more are so more than welcome <3
> 
> I'm spectralarchers on tumblr, come say hi!


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